It doesn’t happen often, but from time to time you will have a student in a Bible class or other ministry setting that is consistently disruptive. You have probably tried everything, but seen little change in behavior. You may have even spoken with the parents and find they struggle at home with similar behaviors. Meanwhile, you are losing valuable learning time and your class or activity is in chaos.
The root cause of the behavior could vary greatly. Perhaps it really is a child who doesn’t have consistently enforced limits and boundaries at home. Or perhaps the child has a special needs diagnosis that makes it more difficult to control impulsive behaviors. Or it may be the child has a traumatic past (or present) and is being triggered into behaviors that look like rebellion, but aren’t necessarily. Regardless of the root cause, having a behavior management plan in place can help everyone.
To be effective, children need to be involved in the process. It can also help to show the completed plan to the parents or guardians so they are aware of what was decided (it may help them as well to reinforce the same plan at home). Plans can vary, but should contain the following elements:
- What is the problem behavior (or behaviors)? Try to allow the child to suggest the behaviors which seem to cause problems in class.
- What seems to be a trigger (or triggers) for the problem behaviors? Misbehavior doesn’t happen in a vacuum. For younger children, you can ask what happens right before they misbehave. Be prepared to hear that the child is bored. Don’t get defensive, but rather ask what could make your class more interesting. If the child claims to have no idea, suggest keeping a log for the next few classes. Every time the child must be corrected, either you or the child should write down what happened right before the incident.
- Interventions. This could be a hand signal, a secret code word or a strategy the child can use instead of making a poor choice – like counting to ten, deep breathing or going to a calming area.
- What is the goal of the intervention? The child needs to understand the intervention is an aide to help slow things down, so he/she can calm down a bit and make a less impulsive, better choice.
- What support does the child want? This could overlap the intervention for some young people. It could be some sign from you when you see the student moving towards an impulsive thought process before he/she has time to actually say or do anything. At that signal, the child knows to enact the intervention. For some young people, the supportive sign will be enough, while others will need to add something like deep breathing in order to fully control their behavior.
- Words and actions to deescalate. At times the negative behavior involves interactions with another child who may have similar issues. That’s when things can really escalate quickly. Or the child may be unaware that certain things he/she says or does triggers other students to do things that in turn trigger him/her. Discuss words and actions that can help the student calm a tense situation and those that can make things worse. Make a list and encourage the student to memorize and use it.
- Other resources. You might suggest some special memory verses to use as an internal reminder like “Love is patient. Love is kind.” Or perhaps there are books for the child’s age group on the topic. In some cases, encouraging more sleep or exercise or taking up a calming hobby can put the child in a better frame of mind and make it harder to be triggered.
- Consequences. If the student, does not use the strategies and continues to disobey direct commands, what consequences will be given? Your options in a Bible class setting are limited, but you do have a few options.
- Check-in schedule. Don’t just create a plan and then never discuss the subject again. Check in at least weekly with the student in private. How is the plan working from both of your perspectives? Do any changes need to be made? Has the behavior improved so much that the plan can be set aside? To feel supported the student needs these regular check-in sessions.
Behavior plans take extra time and effort, but they can aide your student outside of the classroom by teaching them how to evaluate and manage a plan to be more godly in their words and deeds. In fact, it is a strategy you may want to teach all of your Bible students as a way to avoid sinning.
