Remember the Creation story in Genesis? After God created Adam, he realized Adam was lonely and created Eve for companionship. Later, the Israelites were organized by family based clans that operated as a unit. And of course, one of the stated functions for the Church (discussed throughout the New Testament in various ways) is this idea of Christians supporting one another spiritually, emotionally and physically.
We were not meant to live in solitude for very long. Yet, your Bible students in late childhood and adolescence have had solitude first thrust upon them by COVID and then exacerbated by their own device driven life style. Gone are the days when young people spent as much time as humanly possible with their friends – talking and laughing. When we couldn’t physically be together, we would talk on the phone for literally hours at a time. While growing up has never been easy, loneliness was rarely felt for very long. If your friends weren’t around, your parents and siblings were right there (the average home was much smaller then!).
Don’t get me wrong. There are some benefits associated with occasional time spent alone with no devices. It’s where reflective thinking on spiritual matters, independent Bible study, dreaming godly dreams, creativity and prayer can happen.
Unfortunately, today’s older children and teens have too much solitary time spent on devices. Often they can be sitting next to a peer and there is little to any interaction because they are both on their phones. This has been found to lead to poor mental health, increased depression and anxiety and a greater susceptibility to peer pressure (in order to avoid even more loneliness by being different from the crowd). There is also research indicating loneliness can cause a decline in executive function skills, which are often the skills used to avoid sinning when tempted.
As a Bible class teacher, you can’t take away their phones when they aren’t with you, but there are things you can do to help curb their loneliness.
- Remind them God is always there to listen. Sometimes young people just need someone to listen to them pour their hearts out. Sharing their feelings and fears can make them feel less alone. God is a great listener who is available any time day or night for as long as they need Him.
- Encourage them to not only attend worship service, Bible classes and ministry events, but interact with others face to face when they are there. Find ways to encourage them to put away the phones and talk to each other. If they are socially awkward, provide ways for them to practice their social skills.
- Provide activities that get them talking to each other and adult volunteers. Give them things to discuss while they are working on a service project together. Have reflection times when everyone is encouraged to share. Have small group and paired discussion questions. Mix it up, but get them talking.
- Spend time with them outside of class and encourage other adults to do the same. Who doesn’t love taking a break and visiting a coffee shop or getting an ice cream? The conversation may not always be deep and spiritual, but spending time with them will make them feel less lonely.
- Encourage families to spend time together hiking, playing board games, doing Bible studies, cooking together, exploring a new area or city, etc. Studies have found that teens who were isolated from their peers handled it much better if they had a close relationship with their family. The parents of your students may be just as lonely as their children and they could all benefit from more time spent interacting with each other. (Interesting side note. That beginning period of COVID when parents and children were home together every day when studied revealed that children and teens actually faired better emotionally and physically (no one measured spiritual) than either before COVID or later when people left the home again for work or school. Experts attribute it to children getting more attention from their parents!)
- Encourage your Bible students to talk with each other during the week either in person, on an app like Zoom or on an old fashioned telephone call. Studies have found that texting actually makes loneliness worse, but these other methods make young people feel less lonely.
- Provide field trips, service projects and small group Bible studies outside of class time to provide more opportunities for them to interact with others. You may have to encourage or manage these interactions a bit at first, but once they get used to having conversations, they should occur naturally.
Don’t leave your Bible students more vulnerable to Satan because they are lonely. Help ease that loneliness and give them the support they need to make good choices.