If you are raising little ones, you are probably going through a tea party stage. For a culture that only offers high tea at special restaurants, somehow our little ones become fascinated with the concept. I think it’s a combination of acting like a grown-up, pretending to be “fancy” and spending time with loved ones in play. Watch carefully and most children will also enjoy serving others as part of the process.
Although I have never had tea in a British person’s home, I have a very clear visual for how I imagine it to be. The family comes wondering into the tea room from their various pursuits. Everyone plops into a comfortable spot while someone prepares each person’s tea just the way they like it. The family snacks as they talk and laugh about their days. The parents share their insights to guide their children through the issues of the day. In cool weather, I even imagine a fire in the fireplace. On beautiful days, the tea is outside or the windows are allowing a cool breeze into the room. While I am sure this is not the scene in many British homes, the ideal is there.
What I love about the ritual of afternoon tea (in addition to cucumber cream cheese sandwiches!) is that it provides a time each day when the family comes together and interacts with each other in an intentional way. In my mind, it isn’t stiff and formal (although I am sure manners instruction is given), but rather a warm family time. It is something everyone can look forward to – especially on those not so great days. It’s a time when the children can count on getting the full attention of their parents when they want to tell them something. It’s a time where family warmth and nurturing is built into each day.
Your family doesn’t have to start having afternoon tea. In Nordic countries, they have intentional breakfasts and dinners together. Maybe in your home the bedtime ritual can be an hour set aside for the entire family to cuddle and talk before bed. When you do it doesn’t matter as much as the consistency and the full attention given to everyone in the family. Studies have shown that families that have dinner together nightly raise children who have higher grades and better behaviors. They are less likely to engage in dangerous pursuits like underage drinking and drugs. It’s not about the food, but rather the focused attention the parents are giving their children during those times. As Christians, these times also give you a great opportunity each day to have a family devotional. It may take extra time and effort or even mean cutting out a few things from your schedules, but it is something that will strengthen your family and help your children grow to their full God given potential.
